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Filtering by Tag: mindset

The Power of our Words

Jamieson Van Loan

Last week I discussed the power of thought. The idea that your thoughts are essentially the canvas for your day-to-day life. The other, and easily as critical, factor that is an extension of thought, is the power of our words.

I have touched on this before, but we tend to forget how powerful our words are. Just like the thoughts you put out into the universe help create the world around, words are also generators within our existence.

First of all, think about your words and how they affect others. You can use your language to create love in someone’s life, to make them happy, to make them sad, to help, to hinder, to make them feel secure, to shame, to hurt them, to cause pain, to cause joy, to heal, etc. Your words have a direct impact on the people around you. Essentially your words have the power to uplift the people around you or destroy them.  How insane is that power? You can alter someone’s entire path through your words. 

I once read an article about imagining your words as either bullets or seeds. If your words are hurting someone or dragging them down or condemning them or negatively criticizing them, your words are bullets. They are destructive. If your words are seeds and they are showing support and creating a nurturing world with others, they are constructive. Speak seeds, not bullets.

Our goals as humans should be to raise our language. Not in an ostentatious manner but in a demonstrative way.  We should be constantly promoting the well-being of ourselves and others. Building up, not tearing down.

Imagine the world without language (anyone seen the movie, “A Quiet Place”? Watch it!) and how difficult it would be to make human connection. How are you using language to connect with the world?

But what about language and how it pertains to you? To your mindset?  To your goals?  

There is an energy factor behind your words. Imagine how you feel when you’re around your best friend and you’re chatting and laughing. The energy that exudes from the shared language between you is positive and almost palpable. When you are in a difficult situation and the verbiage becomes negative, your energy level drains.

This energy is what hides behind intention. We must harness the energy that comes from our words, from our connections, to create the intentions that we set forth in our day.

How are you going to approach the world today? With love? With stress? With frustration? With truth? With kindness  & compassion?

The energy we put towards our linguistic construct is quintessentially our character, the basis for our true selves. So the way we language is a critical part of how the world views us. This is why honesty is always the best policy. What you speak, speaks volumes of your character.

Keep this in mind for when you speak to yourself. Be kind and compassionate to yourself. Self love is the most important love. 

With our words setting our daily intentions, we can then begin to verbalize our goals, our dreams and set them into motion. It is vital to have full faith in your words. To truly believe that what you say will indeed manifest. Manifestation through language is just as powerful as manifestation through the mind. Believe in your thoughts and words and the rest will follow.
 
My bottom line: 

Always speak the truth. Always speak with consistency. Try to avoid gossiping or wasting time on verbal trivialities. Speak to create positivity around you. Speak with intention. Speak with love and respect. Be effusive with your language. It will create a positive space for you and for those who enter your universe.

Namaste xo
 

~

Do you trust yourself?

Jamieson Van Loan

I was always the person who listened to their gut. I can sense people's energies or vibrations, if you will, and I always know right away if we will be true friends or not. I can sense people's real emotions (which isn't always the one they are emoting) and know how to cater to their needs. I always knew in my gut what the best decision was for my work. I made decisions quickly and typically without regret. I knew myself and what was best for me.  I used to trust in my intuition implicitly. 

Keywords: used to

We all have heard the lines "listen to your heart" "follow your inner voice" "trust your gut" but what if that voice inside of you is sending you mixed signals? 

As life is constantly throwing us curve balls, I have had to take a step back from this implicit self-trust. I have been in this strange headspace where I am aware of what (I think) my gut is saying and I have to really evaluate where that conversation is coming from. Am I projecting? Is it based on bias? Is it based on personal history? Is it my ego?

What I have realized is that whenever I am in a grand evolution, my intuition can be faulty. I am in between the past and the future me and my gut sometimes doesn't have time to catch up. It does not help if you have made some gut-based decisions and they have turned out tragically wrong. Boy, does that put you in a headspin?!

Your intuition is constantly self-protecting you. And it damn well should! It keeps your vulnerability at bay and only allows situations to be beneficial to you. It is your fiercest guardian. 

But when you are transitioning or going through difficult situations in life-whether this be with work, relationships, personal growth, etc- how can you refine your intuition to be more accurate? This is what I have been struggling with.

How can I trust myself again?

Personally, it has taken a great deal of self-awareness. I question myself and the basis for my feelings. Are they real and accurate or are they based on my imagination running wild? Typically anytime my gut is wrong, I have been following the latter. And that is ok! We all do it. We all only truly see the world through our own eyes. This means our experiences, our positive and negative pasts, influence how we think and react. It is human nature. But sometimes we have to be bigger than that. We have to sift through our historical biases and realize what our gut is honestly preaching. Realizing that your gut is the teeny tiny voice inside of you rather than the one bombarded by skeptical questions and influenced by experiences and outsiders; that stark voice is the one you listen to.

I am learning to trust myself again. I am realizing that my past mistakes have only carved out a more beautiful soul. I have stopped beating myself up over wrong decisions. I am welcoming a new version of me, one where I can trust myself wholeheartedly again. It is not easy. For anyone who has been in my situation and understands that question of  "why the heck did I do that?", please know that you are in good company. It is healthy to question your intuition. It creates more self-awareness and opens up a honest personal dialogue that urges the growth to your next great evolution.

On the other hand, be grateful for the little voice, that defender of your soul. It is your greatest peronal resource. 

Flatliner vs Rollercoaster

Jamieson Van Loan

Do you ever feel like you're in a constant state of talking about the weather and the more mundane things in life because people are polite and the idea of getting deep and dirty with a stranger is too vulnerable for most? 

Well, I do. And most of the time, I do not mind it. It's the socially acceptable philosophy to small talk, but sometimes you meet someone and they dive right in and you're like woah, me gusta. It is lovely when people have a grasp on ego and vulnerability and take it to the next level from the beginning. Try it sometime, open up deeply to a stranger you vibe with. It may welcome a new friend to your tribe. 

Recently I met someone such as this and besides being extremely interesting and having a wonderful insight on the positive side of life, he taught me about his philosophy on rollercoasters and flatliners.

Que pasa, you ask? Well so did I. 

It is the concept that there are two people in the world, those that rollercoaster through stressful moments and those that flatline. If you are someone who reacts (or overreacts) when life is throwing you curveballs, you're a rollercoaster. The rest of you who stay fairly level-headed and maintain course during trying times, you're a flatliner.
I love this idea and terminology. 

Honestly, as much as I'd like to think of myself as a flatliner, I am most certainly a rollercoaster. With meditation, yoga, therapy and my other self care rituals, I have become much more flatlined in response to drama. And maybe it's the Gemini in me, but the desire to respond to drama and vent feels intrinsic, almost necessary. 

Here is where I am dead wrong. 

It is a choice. 

This past week has certainly been filled with a LOT of ups and downs. Deliveries didn't go as expected, orders got mixed up and I did the best that I could with what the universe was serving me. There were moments where I wanted to export my stress, mostly by venting, ie complaining. But how is that serving me? Does it feel great to get things off your chest? Of course, I get it. And there are certain people who are available to be that sounding board for you. But on the whole, all the complaining or overreacting to stress is doing NOTHING but hurting you. 

Besides the negative health repercussion of elevated levels of cortisol (the hormone released when you're stressed, cure/shameless plug: Maikana's adaptogen superblends), you're also creating a barrier to a more positive life. 

Negativity breeds negativity. 

Here is your goal this weekend: every time your kids or spouse or work or life are driving you crazy and you want to respond by heightening the situation, I want you to pause. Take a deep breathe. Take ten of them. Remind yourself of all the love you're surrounded by. And choose not to be a rollercoaster. Choose to flatline. 

This choice will change you for the better. 

Stubborn Mindsets

Jamieson Van Loan

I typically spend my three hour delivery period listening to podcasts. I am intrigued by political, psychological and entreprenurial based podcasts. One such podcast this week spoke about our mindset going into situations. I like to think of myself as someone who sees the glass half full but this particular podcast really made me reevaluate my mindset surrounding my expectations. 

When you go into a situation expecting something negative to occur, you automatically seek out the negatives to reinforce the outcome you initially expected. You want to justify your mindset. For example, I am not the biggest fan of Crossfit (aka I'm just not good at it) so when I attend a Crossfit class, I tend to nitpick what I don't enjoy about the class and those things stay in my memory. It is human nature to want to prove yourself right. 

But where does this get us? Have you ever met a person and judged them on their appearance and then wanted them to fit into this box you built in your brain about them? Were you ever surprised when they didn't fit into that box? We all do it. We wish we didn't but we do. 

Letting go of these preconceived notions is not easy. But it is pertinent to work on these stubborn mindsets. Open your world up to being wrong about a person or situation. It is actually quite a beautiful thing to challenge your mindset and be proven wrong. It is here that we find our growth.  

I am constantly asking myself, am I projecting my own experiences on a situation in order to reinforce what I want to be true? And if so, I try to reimagine an alternate result or idea. Try not to see the world in black and white. It is in the shades of grey that we find our evolution. 

Thanks for "listening" to my Friday rant. This week's menu can be found below or by clicking HERE. Don't forget to use code: FRIDAY5 for 5% off by 6pm tonight.

Maikana will have samples at Elliptica in Greenwich all weekend. See image below. They are having free classes all weekend. Go check it out! 

I hope you all have a good and healthy weekend ahead of you! 

Jamiesonxo

Stop expecting.

Jamieson Van Loan

PSA of the day:

Expectations in life are quite often difficult to manage. We set ourselves up for constant disappointment because we expect a certain outcome from a situation or a response from an individual that is similar to what ours would be. It is this idea that you assume other people will come from the same rational place that you do. Except, they come from their OWN rational place. Their mindset is created through an entirely different set of experiences. So why do we constantly go into situations with our own set of expectations and end up being hurt, rejected, let down? 

Because it is human nature. It is human nature to think that the people you have chosen to surround yourself with, family included, is going to think and act the same way or similar to you. OR what I tend to do, is expect them to KNOW how I am feeling or what I expect of them and therefore do that, rather than do what they think. The world is not made up of mind readers. 

This is a reminder to me and everyone else- do not expect anything from anyone. They and the world do not owe you a thing! When you approach a situation with zero expectations, there are no disappointments.

Yes, you can feel disappointed that your husband chose to not take out the garbage sitting by the door BUT you should not have expected it to happen unless you asked point blank. End of story. You do not have a right to be externally upset about it. Sorry ladies!

How many times have you thought "but I would never do that?" What people choose to do is a part of their character, not yours. Try to remember that. And be a little more forgiving to yourself and others when they do not meet your unspoken expectations. It makes for a much quieter mind. 

Have a great weekend! Go into seeking nothing and enjoy all of it! 

Jamieson xo