Contact Us

Please fill out the form and we will get back to you as soon as we can. Thanks for your patience!

(203) 981-2193

Blog

Filtering by Tag: expectations

Holding Space

Jamieson Van Loan

A lot of our holiday season is spent holding space for others. We do this without even realizing. Now that I think about it, we are constantly holding space for others. Effortlessly. The problem is that we don’t always hold space for ourselves.

Let’s start at the beginning though, what is holding space, you ask?

Essentially it’s the act of being present and there for someone else. It is giving someone compassionate, nonjudgmental support. Lovingly embracing them in not just a physical space but in an emotional one.

This comes easily to me. Comforting and protecting another soul. Done and done. The problem for me and I’m assuming a lot of us, is do you take the time to hold space for yourself?

I had someone recently tell me that my philosophy of “do you” is a bit selfish. And I can understand why they would think this- if the whole world was doing whatever the heck they wanted- there would not be a great deal of global forward movement. But that is not what the “do you” ideal is really getting at. I believe we should be doing what feeds our soul each day. And yes, there is a wee bit of annoying adulting that gets in the way, but life is a balance. The most important aspect is that when we do what makes ourselves or our inner spirit happy, we then become more generous, kind and joyful humans overall. Our happiness creates a ripple effect. Being “selfish” enough to seek personal happiness is the most effective way to spread more joy in the world.

The interesting dynamic is that we hold space for others best AFTER we have taken the time to hold space and care for ourselves. Just like you put your oxygen mask on first before helping those with you, you need to care for yourself first. Emotional self care is of the utmost importance.

Be open to others holding space for you. I, admittedly, do not ask for help often or easily. But we cannot thrive without our tribe and this means allowing them to support you unconditionally. Be vulnerable and accept the space and support. 

What I’ve enjoyed seeing on social media this past week is the honesty surrounding the holidays. While some may thrive off the holiday spirit, others are feeling their lowest. And that is ok. However you feel this week, just know you are not alone.

Here is what I’m personally doing this week: I am managing my expectations. This applies to all things, not just the holiday season. Expectations typically incite disappointment. Allowing things to unfold as they come and being at peace with the situation is true emotional intelligence. It has taken me a very long time to learn this lesson. I have to accept that there will be circumstances that will upheave my peace and all I can do is control my response. Holding my space and being compassionate to myself when things may go awry is crucial. Taking a note from Frozen, “let it go” is sometimes the best response. Try that this week: just let go of what is not serving you, let go of expectations, let go of perfection, let go of ego, let go of negativity, let it ALLLL go. Breathe in love, exhale everything that is not benefiting you. Hold your space!

I wish you all a very peaceful and beautiful week ahead! Sending you all love and good health.

Jamieson xo

Happy Birthday to me!

Jamieson Van Loan

This upcoming week is my birthday. June 5 to be exact. I am definitely not a birthday person AT ALL. I like to let them quietly slip by and pretend they aren't happening. But for your benefit we are doing 10% off all of next week's orders AND a big discount on the 5 day power bowl delivery. $65 vs the typical $80. Wow! 

Use promo code:
BIRTHDAYWISHES to get the 10% off this week. 

I have to be honest, this past year has been beautiful and extremely trying all at the same time. I have learned quite a lot, some positive, some negative but lessons all the same.

For one, I am so lucky that I am person who attracts beautiful humans to connect with. I am surrounded by loving friends and family constantly. I thank you you all for your never-ending support. These wonderful people are constantly feeding me the energy I need to get through the tough days and cheering me on during the days of bliss. I love you all. Do not stop telling those glorious people in your tribe how much they mean to you. They can never hear it enough. 

But my biggest lesson this year is to let go of my (typically high) expectations. It is one thing to have high expectations for your personal goals, it is a complete other to set expectations for what your life or career should be. If you had sat me down on my last birthday and told me where I would be today, I would have never believed it. Life will never stop throwing you curveballs. It is by finding grace, humility and strength that you can keep hitting those curveballs out of the park. Do your best to take what life gives you in stride. Let go of expectations of what life SHOULD be. This is not feeding your soul.

Find the little things each day that makes your soul shine- that is my birthday wish for you! 

Have a wonderful weekend! 
Jamieson xo

Stubborn Mindsets

Jamieson Van Loan

I typically spend my three hour delivery period listening to podcasts. I am intrigued by political, psychological and entreprenurial based podcasts. One such podcast this week spoke about our mindset going into situations. I like to think of myself as someone who sees the glass half full but this particular podcast really made me reevaluate my mindset surrounding my expectations. 

When you go into a situation expecting something negative to occur, you automatically seek out the negatives to reinforce the outcome you initially expected. You want to justify your mindset. For example, I am not the biggest fan of Crossfit (aka I'm just not good at it) so when I attend a Crossfit class, I tend to nitpick what I don't enjoy about the class and those things stay in my memory. It is human nature to want to prove yourself right. 

But where does this get us? Have you ever met a person and judged them on their appearance and then wanted them to fit into this box you built in your brain about them? Were you ever surprised when they didn't fit into that box? We all do it. We wish we didn't but we do. 

Letting go of these preconceived notions is not easy. But it is pertinent to work on these stubborn mindsets. Open your world up to being wrong about a person or situation. It is actually quite a beautiful thing to challenge your mindset and be proven wrong. It is here that we find our growth.  

I am constantly asking myself, am I projecting my own experiences on a situation in order to reinforce what I want to be true? And if so, I try to reimagine an alternate result or idea. Try not to see the world in black and white. It is in the shades of grey that we find our evolution. 

Thanks for "listening" to my Friday rant. This week's menu can be found below or by clicking HERE. Don't forget to use code: FRIDAY5 for 5% off by 6pm tonight.

Maikana will have samples at Elliptica in Greenwich all weekend. See image below. They are having free classes all weekend. Go check it out! 

I hope you all have a good and healthy weekend ahead of you! 

Jamiesonxo

Stop expecting.

Jamieson Van Loan

PSA of the day:

Expectations in life are quite often difficult to manage. We set ourselves up for constant disappointment because we expect a certain outcome from a situation or a response from an individual that is similar to what ours would be. It is this idea that you assume other people will come from the same rational place that you do. Except, they come from their OWN rational place. Their mindset is created through an entirely different set of experiences. So why do we constantly go into situations with our own set of expectations and end up being hurt, rejected, let down? 

Because it is human nature. It is human nature to think that the people you have chosen to surround yourself with, family included, is going to think and act the same way or similar to you. OR what I tend to do, is expect them to KNOW how I am feeling or what I expect of them and therefore do that, rather than do what they think. The world is not made up of mind readers. 

This is a reminder to me and everyone else- do not expect anything from anyone. They and the world do not owe you a thing! When you approach a situation with zero expectations, there are no disappointments.

Yes, you can feel disappointed that your husband chose to not take out the garbage sitting by the door BUT you should not have expected it to happen unless you asked point blank. End of story. You do not have a right to be externally upset about it. Sorry ladies!

How many times have you thought "but I would never do that?" What people choose to do is a part of their character, not yours. Try to remember that. And be a little more forgiving to yourself and others when they do not meet your unspoken expectations. It makes for a much quieter mind. 

Have a great weekend! Go into seeking nothing and enjoy all of it! 

Jamieson xo