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Filtering by Tag: perception

Like I was saying...

Jamieson Van Loan

Last week I discussed perception and having empathy for others views within the same situation. This week I want to discuss perception on a grander scale. Recently, I have been working on my mindfulness and part of this is that I am actively trying to notice my negative thoughts. Every time a negative thought passes through my mind, I acknowledge it and politely ask it to vacate my mind.

This is freakin' difficult! I have come to realize that my thoughts seem to gravitate towards worst case scenarios and critical dissections of my day. But why? 

Am I a person who sees the glass half empty? Is my natural perception of the world a negative one? 

My friends would say absolutely not. I am everyone's biggest cheerleader. I truly want the best for everyone, including myself. So why do I lean towards the negative?

It is an evolutionary trait to be naturally drawn to awfulizing thoughts. It is a part of our fight or flight defense mechanism. It is actually NOT an evolutionary trait to be outwardly positive.

So how are you viewing the world today? It's a rainy, gray day. How do you turn that into a positive? How is your glass half full today? 

When I lived in Costa Rica, we would have almost six months of no rain. Not one single drop. Finally, on the first day of rain, everyone would be in the streets rejoicing in it. Literally dancing in the rain. It was such a beautiful sight to witness. So whenever it rains now and I just want to hide under my covers and watch Netflix instead of venturing out in the world, I think of how grateful I used to be for rain.  

Automatic negative interpretations might be an evolutionary response but fighting against them is a more human one. I am going to continue my positive mindfulness and hopefully become more of a glass completely full type of person. 

Thanks for "listening" to my Friday rants. I always appreciate your insightful feedback. 

Have a wonderful rainy day! 
Jamieson xo
 

Perception vs Reality

Jamieson Van Loan

I had this strange incident this week. I was walking my beautiful fur baby and she desperately wanted to cross a super busy street. When she wants to cross, she just goes for it, zero cares for oncoming traffic. It is terrifying but I always try to pull her back and tell her firmly no and to wait. As I was pulling her back, a person yelled out of their car "Stop abusing your dog".  I was stunned. What?! This dog is my heart and soul. I was protecting her and hopefully teaching her to be aware of cars. I wanted them to come back so I could defend myself.

I'm aware they were a) probably trying to get a rise out of me (yep, worked)
 b) know nothing of the reality.

But for 15 minutes afterwards I cared enough to be thoroughly annoyed about the situation. Here is the conclusion to that fifteen minute think through...perception and reality rarely live in the same room. 

Furthermore, your perception of a situation and someone else's perception of the exact same situation do not always match up. This imbalance is not the problem. The issue is how you accept and handle those misconceptions.

For most relationships, (friendship, family, marriage) you have most likely been tested on your perception of a situation vs theirs. Currently, I can think of at least three incidents this week where I stood across the room from the people I care about and felt challenged by their positions and perception.

Enter: empathy, stage right. It is far from easy for me to constantly live in someone else's shoes or have that constant source of compassion for their stance, but I sure as hell try. I fail as much as I try (file that under stubborn). But part of the raw beauty of two humans genuinely caring for each other, is the exposure to theirperception of the world. Cherish the differences. They are a part of the joys in life. Even when the differences seem so incredibly frustrating, appreciate them.

Now to go snuggle my pup. Have a wonderful weekend!
Jamieson xo