As promised last week, I am going to share some lessons/experiences/thoughts/feelings that I really took to heart this past year. I hope you can relate to one or two.
Here we go:
1) Kindness is free and effin amazing, so share it....
We should always approach every single situation with kindness. It shows respect and honors others' time and space. I often find myself stressed out and then my kindness tends to go out the window. I constantly remind myself that kindness is the easiest thing I can do and its changed how I go about my day. Be kind, always.
2) Love is the basis of our existence. Find your inner love and share it.
First and foremost you need to love yourself. Like really love even the darkest places of your soul. You need to be happy with your thoughts, the way you view and exist in the world and from there, your inner love will shine outwardly. It is super cheesy but it is also the greatest way to change your day and, really, your life. Once you love yourself and can then share that love, your entire existence will change.
3) Self-care is beyond important but also doesn’t mean spending a fortune and stressing yourself out
I think we have all had an overload of self-care lately. Just like diet fads, new self-care must-dos are popping up everywhere. Lately I have found that my biggest self-care routine is doing absolutely nothing and putting my phone away. I don't need spas or face masks or the newest workout craze- I just need time to contemplate and breathe. Don't let self-care become a stressor. Only invite in easy and affordable ways to take care of yourself.
4) Your tribe is everything. Treat them as such.
We talked about this last week. Your support system is what gets you through each day. As it's our greatest human desire to be respected and appreciated, show this love to the people who surround you. Make sure your tribe aligns with the life that you want.
5) Your energy and vibrations are for REAL (and you should pay attention to them)
What you put out into the world, you get back to you. Listening to your intuitions and creating a positive energy within you, allows you to vibrate at a higher level. It may sound woo-woo to you, but I promise if you begin meditating and manifesting a positive energy force around and within you, your life will change for the better. The higher energy you create invites others with the same high energies, and this reinforces your kickass tribe.
6) Stress is real but impermanent.
Enough said. We all have stress but it doesn't stick with us. Rather than putting energy into the stress, allow it to exist and acknowledge that it will eventually fade. Taking charge of the stress, rather than let it own your day is a healthier way to coexist with it. Just keep in mind, this too shall pass.
7) Own your shit.
We all have moments when we aren't the greatest versions of ourselves. We get angry, we have meltdowns, we stress out, we take things out on people who don't deserve it- we are a flawed species. But you need to own it. You need to apologize when needed. Sometimes you need to eat crow. You need to be aware of when your shit is overflowing into someone's else's life. This means constant self-awareness and humility.
8) Dance like no one is watching.
Literally and figuratively. Life is way too short to care about others' opinions of you. If you want to dance- do it- like a freakshow. Trust me, I do it all the dang time. This is just a reminder to go for whatever makes you happy in life, regardless of others. And do it with extreme passion.
9) Learn to say no but come from a place of yes.
Saying no is sometimes the hardest thing we can do. I often struggle with this. I stretch myself thin saying yes to everyone and everything. I am learning to value my time and energy over anything else. I am learning to say no and not feel guilty. But I also come from a place of yes. Yes to new experiences, yes to getting outside my comfort zone, yes to things that push me to grow.
10) Your language, inner and outer, lends to your mindset.
How you treat yourself in your head is crucial. The language that you use when you talk to yourself or others is lending to the space that you hold. If you are being negative internally, it will lead to negativity externally. So be positive and kind to yourself. Your words have power. They create intentions. They affect others. Be purposeful with your language.
11) You can only control yourself (and accepting this is crucial to happiness)
I feel like the biggest complaints I give or I hear from friends are always about situations we cannot control. Realizing that we can only control ourselves, our thoughts and our reactions is so important to leading a happier life. It is also about letting go of expectations. You cannot control the past, the future, nor anyone else (even the people you think you can). Accepting this, while putting away your expectations, puts you on the road towards happiness.
12) Honesty really is the best policy.
Don't lie to yourself. Don't lie to others. Approach all situations with the utmost integrity. It speaks to who you are. Be someone with moral high grounds.
13) Find your inner child and live by his/her rules.
Remember the simpler days: the days you ran to everywhere you were going, you had energy for days, you giggled and found joy in the mundane. Find that inner child inside of you and try to live more aligned to his/her values. Don't take things so seriously and realize that we are just specks of dust in this grand universe. Life should be less serious, more fun. Otherwise what are we here for?
14) Be vulnerable. It’s important.
Vulnerability is such a valuable tool. We tend to shy away from it because it is scary and letting your guard down invites possible hurt and rejection. But this is where your biggest leaps and bounds in life happen. In the place of discomfort, we grow. Learn to live with your vulnerable side- it's really the most honest and beautiful part of your soul.
15) Just breathe.
When in doubt, just breathe. Really deep, slow, long breaths. It naturally calms down your nervous system and allows your mind to relax. Taking five minutes out of your day to close your eyes and just focus on your breath is a real game-changer.
I hope you enjoyed my top lessons over this past year. I'd love to hear some of yours. Please share!
Lots of love,
Filtering by Tag: gratitude
As promised last week, I am going to share some lessons/experiences/thoughts/feelings that I really took to heart this past year. I hope you can relate to one or two.
I had an entire rant planned today about the lessons I’ve learned over this past year of my life (officially 37 guys!!). A synopsis of my favorite truths and experiences. But I just got home from an amazing birthday dinner with some amazing women and I’d like to take a minute to chat and show gratitude towards my past week with loved ones.
(Also, I will share my previously prepared rant next week because it’s a goodie)
People tell me that I have a very eclectic group of friends. I tend to gravitate towards people who own their truths, can dive deeply inwards and speak about the light and the darkness within without hesitation, and live in a no judgement zone. Authenticity is an imperative. Humor and the ability to laugh at oneself is a close second. My besties, my soul sisters (and brothers!), my closest humans come from all walks of life, from a multitude of countries, are all different ages and from all different chapters of my life. It is quite an experience when I get to bring them all together.
Every single one of these people (and you know who you are) have had a profound impact on who I am today. They all support me in a way that allows for failure but also cheers on my success. They constantly go the distance for me and are so vulnerable and courageous- that even Brené Brown would be proud. They push me and question me and don't let me fall back into my comfort zone. They are my wondrous, amazing tribe- my support system. I would be lost without them.
To use the cliched saying, “I’m blessed” is a vast understatement.
Let me start by saying that on my birthday this past week, I received more text messages, calls, emails, FaceTimes, Facebook posts, Instagram messages and people just showing up at my door more than ever before. And every beautiful and sincere well-wish came with such generosity and love that I was floored. My heart was and is so full. This does not even slightly cover my gratitude but I am extremely grateful for each and every one of you who took time out of your busy lives to send me love and spend time with me. Thank you, thank you, thankyou!
So why does this all matter? What I realized is that I would have never gotten to my 37th birthday without these people. I cried with my best friend on my actual birthday when we talked about where I was just a year ago and how far I've come. Her, along with a plethora of other folks, mentally and emotionally carried me to the space I am now. I've talked about this before but we cannot succeed in life alone. We aren't built for that. We are made for connection, intimacy and depth. We are made to be a part of a community that feeds our soul.
So today's lesson is: love, acknowledge and treasure your tribe.
Do not take your support system for granted. Appreciate the crap out of them. Every. Single. Day.
Abundantly happy and grateful,
There is something in the air this week. Chaos, that dirty ol’ B, has entered my home and I am not happy about it. You all know that I meditate, actively practice mindfulness and gratitude, practice yoga, go to therapy- essentially, do my utmost each day to show up and be the best version of myself. But damnit if there aren’t weeks that just push me so far that I can do nothing but give in. I have to surrender to the monkey mind, to the daily stresses, to the roller coaster and allow the universe to swirl around me. My younger self would be inclined to freak out, probably drink a bottle of wine and export all my stress on my closest humans. Joy oh joy.
My current self acknowledges that days or weeks like this just exist and there is nothing I can do about it but keep on swimming. In the heightened moments of stress, I still practice my deep breaths, my mindfulness and reality checks, but sometimes it is not enough. Sometimes I need more. Sometimes I need a release. I need to cry. I need to yell. I need to run (literally, and if you know me, that doesn't happen often). I need to dance my face off. I need to eat a lot of Girl Scout cookies.
I like to think of these weeks as transition weeks. No one’s path is constant and steady. Our lives are peaks, plateaus and valleys. Sometimes we are winding up or down these mountains (or being hurled up or down) but either way, we are in motion.
I imagine myself on an island that is lovely and comfortable but I can see another island ahead and it’s magnificent and has way better fruit but I need to get there. Sometimes the ocean between these islands is calm and gently rocks me to my new space but sometimes the seas are rough and angry and I have to fight to arrive at my island. This week I paddled against the current with high winds and a hole in my boat. Either way, my motion is forward. I am moving through it. I am not fighting against the volatile universe. I am accepting the chaos and progressing.
Acceptance is critical in these moments. Letting go of control and expectations and owning that you may have to eat some shit sandwiches in life allows the darker moments a shorter lifespan. Acceptance of the uncontrollable aspects of your day grants you the freedom to separate, almost elevate, yourself from its negative grip. The chaos loses its power over you.
In yoga teachings, the Sanskrit word for faith is Sraddha. It is this faith, or energy, that you hold that your life is on its exact path. The concept that no matter what, you're exactly where you are meant to be at that given moment. The essence of sraddha always rings truer and louder during the darker or chaotic life moments. For me when the unanswerable questions bubble up inside, my sraddha deepens. Always knowing your life is where it is meant to be, good or bad, makes accepting the chaos easier.
With Thanksgiving rapidly approaching (where did this year go?!), chaotic weeks like this inspire the most gratitude for me. Eating shit sandwiches reminds me of how great my life truly is.
As an ode to Thanksgiving next week, here are some excerpts from my gratitude journal:
I am grateful for the people in my tribe who support me relentlessly and aggressively. My best friends who never allow me to accept second best or settle and push me towards gold.
I am grateful for my family who have seen me and supported me at my best and worst. They are the foundation that I stand upon.
I am grateful for the people who make me belly laugh, who heighten my joy, who brighten even my best days.
I am grateful that I have the luxury to pursue my passion each and every day.
I am grateful for my health. For without it, I would be nowhere.
What are you grateful for?
Write it down, say it aloud. Shout it from your heart!
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving week! Squeeze your loved ones and tell them what you love about them.
Be love, share love. xo
There is a quote I posted on social media that said “anything that annoys you is teaching you patience. Anyone who abandons you is teaching you to stand up on your own two feet. Anything that angers you is teaching you forgiveness and compassion. Anything that has power over you is teaching you how to take your power back. Anything you hate is teaching you unconditional love. Anything you fear is teaching you courage to overcome your fear. Anything you can’t control is teaching you how to let go."
The evolved within us knows all this. The question is: are we actually paying attention to it? Are we being cognizant of the signs and lessons around us?
I recently had the pleasure of meeting someone who completely changed my mindset in life. It is strange when you’re actively pursuing a certain mindset and someone can automatically spark that shift within you. It feels like the universe is speaking to you. This person was in my life for a blink of a moment, but they made me realize how much I was truly lacking. I had forgotten about this momentous person inside of me who valued laughter, joy and fun. It was not that my life did not include those imperatives; it was that I was prioritizing my work over everything else. I prioritize work over my sleep, over my friends, over my social life, over my family, over honestly, all the things that matter the most at the end of the day. To look back on my past post about “what would you do if today was your last day on earth”- I was spending mine working. If I was hit by a bus later today, would my last thoughts be about not emailing that person back or regretting that I hadn’t spent more time with the important factors in my life. I am going to assume the latter.
It is not always easy to be hyper aware of the lessons in life. We are in such a tight hamster wheel of precision and routine that when there are moments of fluster or aggravation, we tend to just follow the emotions. But when we step back and realize that those moments that deter our constant are truly there to push us in a forward motion, we actually grow. My most literal and daily attribute to this is how I am constantly getting stuck behind the slowest drivers. Now most humans would be ok with this, but I am not one of those humans. I tend to be in a rush and wondering why the person in front of me is going eight miles slower than the speed limit, which is actually 15 miles slower than the rest of society. Through deep breathes and self-awareness, I realize that this person is really here to teach me to be patient and that life is not a constant state of rushing (albeit I am normally missing a train to nyc at this point). It has made me grow, evolve.
Every single time I am bothered by someone else’s influence in my life, I take deep breaths and ask myself, “what are they here to teach me?”
There has yet to be an answer that has not rung true for all aspects of my life. I am so grateful to the person who reminded me that fun and laughter is crucial to my purest existence. I am so grateful to the slow drivers for reminding me of my need for patience. I am so grateful to all the people who have made me explore my inner self in order to happen upon some beautiful discovery.
Without exploration, there is no discovery.
My takeaway this week is that we need to be grateful for the people who force us outside of our comfort zones. The people who rile us up or upset us or anger us or frustrate us, they are the people who compel us to hone our reactions and delve deeper into our personas. Be grateful for all of it. These encounters, although not always positive, create a crater of experience that can only be filled with wisdom.
Last week I went to three Paul Simon concerts in a row! I am such a superfan and I couldn't let him retire without seeing him as much as I could. His music has been such a strong force in all chapters of my life. Needless to say, it was amazing but I could sleep for a week straight right about now.
During one of the shows, I started thinking about how he must be feeling. To spend your whole life following your passion and one day, even if by choice, it comes to an end. The bittersweetness of this seemed palpable towards the end of the shows. It got me thinking about how this was the last (of 103!) time he will play Madison Square Garden and this is the last time he will sing this song to tens of thousands of screaming fans. I cannot imagine it was easy for him.
I began to mentally apply this to my life. What if this is my last time attending a concert at MSG? What if this is the last time I get to hang out with my gal pal? What if this is the last time I eat a NYC hot dog with the works (yea that happened)? What if, what if, what if...
Duh. We all know that we should live life to its fullest and be grateful and the whole she-bang but are we really practicing this?
When your kids aren't listening in the morning and you're running on fumes and the bus is about to arrive and they can't find one shoe and you want to run away to a remote island solo...are you really telling yourself, gosh darn it- this is amazing and I'm so grateful?! Prolly not. And that is ok. You are human. But how can you reinforce the gratitude during moments that are stressing you out?
The vicissitudes of daily life will always throw a wrench into our gratitude practices. Refocusing our mindset during those moments is how we build our self-awareness and minimize negative reactions.
So do we actually implement this?
1) Begin to truly recognize negative reactions and feelings when they arise. Be aware of how your body feels in that moment. Speaking for myself, when I get angry or upset, I feel a tightness in my chest. Now that I am hyper-aware of that physical condition, I can validate the emotion and tell myself, "This is how you feel in this moment but it will pass. It is just an emotion and not reality."
Have you realized this? That emotions, although they feel extremely real, are not reality. They are fluid mental states that can alter at any given moment. Do not let them own you.
2) If you've been suckered into the negative realm, taking deep breaths is key. Before responding to the situation, begin taking deep and long breaths. I like to count to five on the inhale and eight on the exhale. It naturally calms your body and the counting distracts you from rash choices.
3) Ask yourself this: will this current situation have any serious bearing in my future life? If your kid misses the bus and you're upset that you now have to drive him or her, what are the chances you'll even remember this moment in a year? The answer should be: zero!
Do not let trivialities affect your mood.
4) Find compassion for yourself. In those moments where you react in a way you're not proud of, forgive yourself and move on. Do not dwell on situations that cannot be changed. It is so easy to over analyze and beat yourself up, but it literally leads no where! Stop analyzing, own the situation, apologize (sincerely) if you need to and move forward.
5) Start your day with gratitude. I personally have a gratitude journal. I write at least three things I'm grateful for before I leave my bedroom. This, combined with my morning meditation, prompts me to begin my day on the right path.
6) I am a firm believer in meditation. I try to be as diligent as I can with my practice but sometimes a week will go by and I have to reset my meditation motivation. It helps create inner peace and raises your frequency. Even if meditation seems too woo-woo for you, there is zero harm in trying it. Give it a whirl.
Now even with these suggestions, will you move forward being a gratitude junkie who is cognizant enough to live each moment like it could be your last? Prolly not. Like I said earlier, we are human and we are flawed. But these tools will begin to set you on a better path. Once you become more conscious of your actions and have a heightened awareness of appreciation, your mindset will shift.
Mindfulness always pays off.
The question now is, are you going to live today like it could be your last?
Or better yet, your first.
How is your week going? I will say that this strange weather from snow storms to rainy and cold to sunshine (and cold) to possible snow again this weekend has made me feel sorta sluggish and once again, unmotivated. I'm ready for a new season mother nature!
This type of slothful haze has forced me to really dig deep for my daily incentives. We all have to get through our days- from driving kids around to meetings to laundry to all sorts of responsibilities. These are the mundane must-dos every day. I like to call these the quiet successes.
Quiet Successes can be as little (in my case HUGE) as having time for a (not rushed) shower, getting a workout class in, making one meal a day super healthy, actually finishing the laundry (does it ever end?), not forgetting that one item at the grocery store- whatever it is, it deserves a mental cheer! Celebrate ticking those things off your to-do list, as silly as they are. These are your quiet successes- that no one appreciates but YOU!
Our menu for next week is below. Try to add some healthy fuel to your body this upcoming week. With bad weather typically comes bad eating habits. Do your best!
Have a great weekend guys!
It has been a very interesting couple of days. This snow storm hit and did some minor but crazy damage to our driveway. We had a live power line light a fire in our driveway that burned for over an hour until the electricity company could come shut down the electricity to the wire so the fire department could do their job. It burned a massive hole into the asphalt and all around it is scorched and torn up but hey, it's a freakin' driveway! Not a big deal at all. I am so grateful that it didn't do more damage. I am also grateful that me and my dog were not in the house when it happened. Thank God for awesome neighbors!! And for the amazing and tireless firefighters who stood watch over our house. I must say, Norwalk Fire Department is on top of it!!
This is all a reminder to not sweat the small stuff (ie how much your kids are driving you crazy after two days home from school) and to be more appreciative for the often neglected blessings in our lives (ie electricity and clean running water) and for the support of the community around us. And let's all hope this is our last snow of the season. I am over it!
This week's menu is up and ready to order. You can see the menu below or by clicking HERE. Maikana has some exciting things in the works. One of them is a completely new line using adaptogens. Do you know what those are? Check out the event we are hosting with our partner, Indigo Acu + Wellness on this new venture. It will explain all about adaptogens. You don't want to miss it!
Have a great weekend everyone! See you at deliveries!
I was listening to a podcast this week and someone said, "If the stars only came out every thousand years, what would you do?"
You would treat that one day in a thousand with such awe, excitement and appreciation. And yet, the stars come out every night for us to admire and appreciate and we stay inside watching Netflix and checking social media on our phones.
There are a million cliches out there to hit home gratitude and appreciation, (stop and smell the roses, appreciate the small things in life, etc) but this one really struck a chord. It might be that I grew up without TV in my life (Fiji didn't have a television channel until I was 12) and I spent most of my time in nature, but this appreciation has shifted for me. It exists in the pocket of "when I have time". New goal: appreciate the beauty of this world. Right now.
And equally as important - the beauty inside me. We are blessed (ugh, social media has ruined this word) to be given healthy bodies and we need to do our utmost to keep them that way. What are you doing to keep your body healthily fueled and happy? What are you doing to truly appreciate your health?
Someone close to me passed away this week. I am not sharing this because I want sympathy or condolences. I am sharing it because death of a loved one is the greatest reminder to be grateful. We all have a finite amount of time on this planet. We go to bed each night stressing over what is to be done or checked off our ever-growing lists and you never know if you'll even see tomorrow. I do not mean to be dark or grim. I, personally, always take life, and health for that matter, a little for granted. I think we all do. And when someone passes away that shed light into your years, you tend to take stock of your life and your remaining loved ones and you begin to seek more gratitude. It is such a shame that death or negative moments in our lives always tend to be the catalyst of a really in-depth scan of our existence. Alas, it is and so today I am truly grateful for everything I have, including all of you. Maikana has given me a purpose beyond what I had imagined. Thank you.
I ask all of you to hug your loved ones a little closer today and truly inhale the love that is constantly around you. We have much more than we will ever need and yet we are always seeking more. Just for one day, stop and be happy for everything you already have.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as they say. I agree. But lately I've realized that noticing and truly appreciating beauty is directly correlated to what side of the bed I wake up on. When I've prepared and can tackle my day without undue stress, I tend to notice all the beautiful details of my day. But when I wake up late and start off crazed and forget all that I had planned and my mind starts rushing, I end up right back in bed at night without one single "oh wow" moment of the day. What is up with that?
I have my health, a roof over my head, clothes on my body, food in my fridge (I have a fridge!), a car, running water, family, great friends, the list is LONG...I am SO fortunate! So why do I spend a LOT of my days running around, stressed out and not appreciating all the beautiful details of my life.
To counter this, I allow for a few extra minutes in bed each morning. I am practicing to appreciate these gorgeous details in life by spending the first few minutes of my day counting my blessings. Even if I am running late, I take one full minute in bed and mentally go through all the people who contribute to my happiness and support me relentlessly. This practice has been helping me to view all the beautiful daily details of my world.
Maikana Friends, I urge you to do what you can to wake up on the right side of your splendid worlds and appreciate that the beauty is in the details.
Have a wonderful & healthy weekend!
The past two weeks Maikana Foods has gotten such an amazing response from the Norwalk & Darien communities. I cannot say anything but thank you. I feel so honored and happy to be a part of such a supportive community. I really thought that when I left my tiny town of 120 people in Playa Grande, Costa Rica to move back to Connecticut that I would never find that same feeling of "community". Boy, was I wrong!!
I've had people reaching out to me with such kind words about my food- which is so lovely to hear. When you enter into a new business (especially as a chef because its based on your own personal skills), you are constantly in a world of self doubt. Am I doing the right thing? Am I crazy? What did I get myself into? Is my food good enough? Can I REALLY do this?
Your words and social media sharing and all the wonderful support ofMaikana Foods has been such an affirmation to my choice to bring healthy power bowls and food to Darien & Norwalk. I cannot thank you all enough.
Your love is felt.